Friday, January 4, 2019

Communicating better with your Partner

We all know that communication is the key to a smooth and happy relationship. You should rank it as the number one thing that helps any relationship last for a long, long time. Talking to each other is one thing, however communicating with your partner is an artform you refine over the years of dating them. 

Relationships that have seen the test of time have fallen apart because of wear and tear. It all boils down to how smoothly and effectively you communicate with your partner. Now the question is how do you keep things running smoothly? We've got a few pointers for you. 

1. Ask them about their day

It's a great way to get to know how your partner's day went. Just asking them how their day was will show them how much you care. Maybe they had a stressful day at work, or maybe something really funny happened to them. Whatever it may be, the fact that you asked them about their day shows your partner that you are invested in their lives. 

2. Ask them how they are feeling

We don't often think about asking people how they are feeling. We overlook this basic question a lot of times, especially when we think we know the person inside-out. A lot of times, feelings and emotions can be a tough topic to breach, especially when it's your own partner. So, reaching out occasionally will keep things running smoothly in your relationship. 

3. Be a good listener

Asking, someone, a whole bunch of questions isn't the key to effective communication. You have to be good at listening to your partner as well. It's a pretty obvious requirement, to be honest. A lot of people think that it can get a little frustrating because all they do is listen while their partner 'rants on'. Paying attention to your partner's wants and needs will allow your relationship to blossom. 

4. Don't forget to say thanks

Have you thanked your partner for being there for you? Showing your significant other your appreciation for them will take your relationship a long way. For your part, you're actually taking the time to pick out qualities of your partner that you have grown to appreciate. Like if your partner is trying hard to quit smoking, then you should take out the time to thank them. Why? Because they actually listened to you and paid enough attention to make that change. Thanking your partner will also make them feel appreciated. 

5. Check in on your relationship status

Talking about where you both stand in your relationship is important. Keeping a tab on where you stand in your relationship basically ensures that you and your partner are on the same page. If you're in a long-term relationship, it helps knowing when you guys want to take the next big step in your relationship: marriage. 

6. Talk about anything that could mess things up

Honesty is the best policy when it comes to any relationship. So if there's something that is coming up in your foreseeable future that could make your relationship difficult, make sure you discuss it beforehand with your partner. A new project at work that's going to take more of your time? Tel your partner. Lots of travel with the new promotion? Talk to your partner about it!

7. Respond to them

Communication is a give-and-take process. You have to be able to give a response to your partner. Especially if they're looking for your advice. It's not just about advice, though. Just being responsive to their texts or their calls will really boost their confidence. The simple act of responding will make them feel valued, appreciated, and loved. 

8. Don't harp on the nitty-gritty

If you like to pick out the tiniest mistakes committed by your partner, then I can guarantee you that you are slowly and steadily driving them away. Slowly, but surely. There's nothing as annoying as someone constantly picking on the tiniest mistakes. I'm sure that if you don't like it, neither will your partner. Learn to let go of the things that don't matter. 

9. Be open-minded

You have to remember that good communication also beckons being open-minded. When you allow yourself to be open-minded, you're giving people the opportunity to trust you a little more. Mainly because they see you as a person they can talk to without the unnecessary judgment. Open-mindedness is something that will strengthen relationships because talking to someone who is non-judgemental builds trust. 

10. Be accepting of change

We're human. We're moving forward, and that means that things are bound to change in some way or another. You have to understand that no one stays the same throughout their lifespan. Attitudes change, emotions strengthen, people grow. It's a part of life, and it's definitely a part of your partner's! Don't let change take you by surprise. Embrace it and allow it to make you a better person. 

11. Don't assume things

Assumptions don't work for anyone. It's best you leave the detective work to the professionals. If you want to know something, you ask your partner directly about it. Is your partner sad? Ask them why. Don't just assume that it could be because they've had a hard day at work. Maybe they're upset with something you have said. Getting the air cleared is better than playing the guessing game.

12. Talk about what gets you going 

Talk about EVERYTHING, people! Especially talk about intimacy! You and your partner will get a better idea of what gets the other going when you TALK about it. There's nothing wrong with discussing your intimate fantasies with your partner. It's only going to strengthen your relationship!
You've also got to keep the communication going behind closed doors, because when the both of you have a fair understanding of what the other likes, then it's smooth sailing all the way through, If you know what I mean!

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